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Movie Review: Get Smart

Alternate Title: Get Lost

Story: How does a movie qualify for Lobo's annual Worst List? Let me count the ways.

I am sure when director Peter Segal started out he had summer blockbuster dreams with sequels aplenty. However, when you put together a team like screenwriters Tom J. Astle and Matt Ember compared with the TV original creative team of Mel Brooks and Buck Henry, let's just say you cannot make a silk purse out of a sows ear. This script stunk. The humor spanned the gamut from fat jokes to toilet and barf scenes. The problem seems that they did not have a target audience like an Adam Sandler film has. They tried to be all things to all people. That simply does not work.

We had four good laughs (not a positive sign when you can count your laughs in a comedy) and the times we did laugh, were derivative jokes in the manner of Mel Brooks.

The movie also did not know when to end. It went on for 30 minutes too long and we actually walked out before the credits started to roll (I have not done that in a long time).

Save your time and money and watch the real Agent 86 and 99 on TV Land reruns.

The trailer is all you need to see: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PK7RSEzP9Q

Acting: I like Steve Carell but am wondering how long you can bank on that puppy hang dog type he is becoming. Has he replaced the crazy Jim Carrey? Anne Hathaway is a lightweight.Dwayne Johnson is big and toothy. Alan Arkin did not have enough screen time and Terence Stamp, can do no wrong in my book, ever.

Predilection: I liked the TV show.

Critters: When a film has to throw in a puppy to cater to the puppy loving crowd there is nothing to do but roll your eyes.

Food: Yellow cake uranium was being made in a bakery.

Sex Spectrum: Please. There was more chemistry between the original TV stars than these two.

Blatant Product Placement: Dell

Soundtrack: Ode to Joy was nice. I don;t remember anything else but noise.

Visual Art: I probably drifted thinking about this category.

Theater Audience: It was crowded at a 4PM showing on a Monday afternoon. It was also a shockingly quiet audience. This film will make money, but surely not by word of mouth.

Weather: The weather was lovely in both Russia and LA

Sappy Factor: 2 - Remember there was a puppy.

Quirky Meter: 0

Squirm Scale: There is a scene in an airplane toilet that is very squirmy. It involves small piercing darts.

Drift Factor: I drifted and drifted and almost had an out of body experience.

Predictability Level: Over the top

Tissue Usage: 0

Oscar Worthy: NO

Big Screen or Rental: Neither.

Length: Too long at just under two hours.