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Guest Movie Review: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Story: It's Harry's second year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and the whole crowd is back along with a couple of additions to the cast. Evil has been unleashed and it's feared the Chamber of Secrets has been opened. Harry is suspected of opening it particularly when it's discovered he is a parcel-tongue (He can speak snake!). Daniel Radcliffe as Harry is a little older, but still adorable, as are his school mates Emma Watson as Hermione and Rupert Grint as Ron Weasley. (There are many, many Weasleys.) Richard Harris as wise headmaster Dumbledore is excellent and will be missed in future movies. The rest of the crowd is there and I am too lazy to type all their names. The newest addition of Jason Issacs who plays Draco Malfoy's father comes across as pure evil and was excellent. I look forward to seeing him in future Potter movies.

Acting: How does one act like a wizard. I believed they all have magical powers. Worked for me.

Predilections: I read all the Harry Potter books and enjoyed them all. So I knew I would enjoy the movie. It was faithful (some say slavishly faithful) to the book, but I didn't care. I love Harry and his friends.

Critters: spiders and snakes. YUK.

Food: I can only remember my popcorn and diet soda. It was right after work and I was starving.

Visual Art: Those same manor paintings with lords and ladies that move.

Blatant Product Placement: None

Soundtrack: Don't remember

Opening Titles: Don't remember

Theater Audience: It wasn't that crowded at a 5 PM weekday movie. A few parents with kids and us.

Sappy Factor: Wizards are not sappy. There is no sappiness allowed at Hogwarts.

Quirky Meter: What's quirky about wizards, spells, mandrakes that can kill you with their hellish screams, a snake that can petrify you if you look it in the eye and spiders that talk?

Squirm Scale: There were some very yucky, large spiders and a really large snake. I squirmed.

Predictability Level: Very High if you read the book. I guess very high if you didn't. I mean, it's not like Harry's NOT going to come out a winner in the end.

Tissue Usage: Only if you have a cold.

Oscar Worthy: Stop It!

Nit Picking: I had no nits to pick.

Big Screen or Rental: Since I rarely go to the movies, I would say rental (or TV) is fine. The first Harry Potter movie is on HBO right now (all the time, it seems. In fact, I think there is a new HBO HP station - HBO Harry Potter and HBO HPL - that's the HBO Harry Potter station in Spanish).

Length: 2 hours and 41 minutes. Waaaay over the Lobo 2 hr limit.

LOBO HOWLS: or, this time, Carol Cheers: 7