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Movie Review: Seven Pounds

Alternate Title: Lightweight

Story: You fight the urge - yet you will not be able to help yourself. This manipulative, contrived, eye-rolling, highly predictable mess of a film will make you cry. Fight it you will - but I warn you - you will shed a tear. Are you sad that you wasted two hours? Wasted some money? Perhaps. But, if you stay until the end, you will cry - nevertheless.

Directed by Gabriele Muccino and written by Grant Nieporte the film purports to keep you mystified as to the protagonists' motives. In order to make the film even more of a seeming puzzle, we view it in a non-linear fashion. However, I figured out the guy's motives within the first 15 minutes and imagine that you will too. We watch him do strange things in his IRS agent outfit (not Man in Black - more like Man in Gray). He visits sick people, blind people, abused people and generally has you thinking he has a Savior mentality or he is just nuts.

I am not going to give away any more of the plot (loose term) but if you like the Will Smith that acts all conflicted, hurt and sad, this is for you. If you like the Will Smith as Super Hero - stay far away. Let me rephrase that - why not just stay away.
Watch the trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hXElPwDlns

Acting: I like Will Smith, but this Will Smith as Ben Thomas is all weepy, sad and unable to express his grief. Rosario Dawson as heart patient Emily Posa, is always interesting to watch. Even in this fluff piece. Woody Harrelson as blind Ezra, is underutilized. Barry Pepper might have lost a bet and that is why he got this role as friend, Dan.

Trivia: Rosario Dawson says she is of Puerto Rican, Cuban, African American, Irish, and Native American descent. She is a huge fan of the Star Trek franchise, and even speaks broken Klingon language. Ka'Plok! Will Smith turned down the role of Neo in The Matrix. He is the first hip-hop artist to be nominated for an Academy Award and speaks fluent Spanish.

Predilection: None

Weather: It is usually sunny unless we need to see buff and toned Will Smith running in the rain.

Critters: A giant Great Dane named Duke and a jellyfish.

Food: Eggplant parmesan, eggs and Chinese takeout.

Sex Spectrum: All fuzzy, romantic, burning candles, raindrops on the window scene where you see nothing but bits and pieces.

Blatant Product Placement: Ford and a Heidelberg Press

Soundtrack: Schmaltzy

Opening Titles: An opening sequence that grabs your attention before the title.

Visual Art: Unimpressive production values.

Theater Audience: Four other stunned patrons.

Sappy Factor: 4

Quirky Meter: 0

Squirm Scale: 0

Drift Factor: I started to look at my watch after 20 minutes.

Predictability Level: Over the top.

Tissue Usage: I fell for the deliberate tear jerker and admit to getting teary despite hating myself for that.

Oscar Worthy: No

Big Screen or Rental: Neither.

Length: Long at two hours.

LOBO HOWLS: 3